By this time next week little sister will be almost a week old. We’ll call her Nellie James, short for Eleanor. This has been a point of some contention, since no one much likes the name other than me. Total strangers have been very rude about it and told me that my child will hate me for this. Family members have winced at the utterance of it. I could care less what they think, maybe I think the same about their names.
The name Nellie James popped into my head on a ride home from Phenix City, before the boy was even a thought. I don’t think things pop in your head and stick for no reason, and that’s why I never even considered another name when we found out we were having a girl. Michael doesn’t like it either and wanted to pick one of the names since that is what we did with our boy. He suggested Eleanor and said we could call her Ellie James.
I consented, until I found out he had a cousin called Ellie. I think a kid ought not to have to share a name with a cousin of the same age. And lucky for me fate stepped in. That night as we sat on the couch discussing it, me nearly with tears in my eyes because I had my heart set on Nellie James, Michael said that Nellie was just a nickname. I decided to look up what it was a nickname for, because maybe that could settle the argument. As it turns out, Nell is a nickname for someone named Eleanor. Funny how things work out.
People keep saying things to me like “I bet you’re so ready” and “I bet you’re so excited.”
I guess technically we are ready, with the exception of a few more things I need to get from the store. And of course I am excited. But the next few days are going to be pretty rough in many ways.
Me and the boy, we have never been apart. I’ve had people scold me over this. Society says you should send your kids to their grandparents overnight and have a life of your own and you should make them go to bed at sunset and sleep alone and cry it out when they are little. As with a lot of other things, I do not subscribe to the opinions of society. When I am on my deathbed I can assure you that I won’t wish that I had made my kids sleep in their own beds at night or that I spent nights away from them. Michael and I have plenty of time to grow old together, but only a few short years to cherish all the sweetness of our little children.
So even though I am excited to meet our newest addition, I am not excited to be away from her brother. And I’m not excited for the recovery period when I will be sleeping in a recliner instead of in the bed with my family. I feel like people are not honest about this part of having more kids, but there is a little bit of mourning that goes along with the happiness and I can’t help but admit it.
I know that mourning period will fade quickly and soon being a family of four will be so normal that we won’t much remember what it was like when it was just the three of us.