I tried to write a column last week, but I said a lot of things that maybe weren’t nice so I decided I’d take the week to see if I could cool off a little. Well I didn’t. I was so annoyed that someone sued the governor over the mask ordinance and that schools are starting back with in-person instruction that I spent the better part of the week looking for houses in Maine, Montana and Kansas and trying to convince my mom and dad to move there with us. I thought I might convince them with the $23,000 school I found for sale in Kansas, since my dad and brother like to go there and hunt every year anyway, but they said no.

Things are bad and about to get worse. If we keep going in this direction that’s not a guess, it’s a fact, and I’m ready to abandon ship.

I had an experience at the hospital last week that didn’t sooth my nerves much. I had to have a test and I was in a waiting room with a lady who took her mask off, slurped a drink, blew her nose and sniffled around. Total defiance. When a nurse came back she threw her mask back on and looked like a school kid who just got caught throwing a paper wad while the teacher was out of the room.

It made my blood boil. But I feel like that’s just Alabama, where there have been more than 92,000 COVID cases and more than 1,600 deaths and only 15 percent of ICU beds are still available but let me just get some fresh air in a hospital waiting room and slurp this tea so I can possibly infect this innocent person sitting across the room from me.

To say that I just want to stick my head in the sand until 2020 is over would be the understatement of the year.

Monday was my seven year wedding anniversary. Michael and I loaded the kids up and headed out for a try at some fun. We decided to go to Desoto Falls. It took forever to get there. The bathrooms were locked. We were supposed to pay $4, but only had three. It started raining, but I said let’s just wait in the car a minute to see if it clears up since we drove all this way. And after a few minutes it did.

So we got out to go look at the waterfalls, because I at least wanted a picture of us all together because I have one of Michael and I there from when we were dating. But, the rocks were slick and thank goodness for my big butt because I fell right on it while holding little sister. The rocks took a huge chunk out of my hand and I was ready to go because I have a weak stomach for flesh wounds.

I was using a dirty bib to soak up the blood, but we stopped at a gift shop so the boy and his dad could potty and they sold band aids there. My hand felt better with a proper bandage, but the band aids smelled like they’d been in there since the 1960s. And that’s pretty much sums up what this year has felt like to me since spring.

But here is something happy. My neighbor’s cow had twins. That has been a wonderful source of curiosity for me for the past few days, since it had never occurred to me that a cow could have twins. I guess there is always something nice going on in the world, even if most of it seems like it’s falling apart.

Danielle Wallingsford Kirkland is a former Sentinel staff writer and correspondent. She can be reached at danielle.w.kirkland@gmail.com.

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